Dava goes Paddling!

With the ever-lovely Jessica Gomez

Dava Goes Paddling at Milford Beach

Sooo...Jess and Dava take New Challenges part 2. (Gotta come up with a less lengthy title. Suggestions? 🤔) Let me preface this one ‘cause it’s a doozy! I’ll backtrack a bit here. Not even 2 weeks before this recent adventure, Jess went paddling with her phone in a protector around her neck. Are you with me so far? Good. Just getting started. Now, long story short, she loses her phone in the ocean. Gone. It has drifted in the blue abyss that is the vast and indiscriminate ocean. Cool. Now, let’s come back to this moment. I’d like to acknowledge the fact that I had ONE JOB. “Dava, hold my phone. Don’t lose it.” Ok, challenge accepted. She brings her keys in a newly gifted, waterproof protector around her neck. Her new bank card is in there and so is her newly replaced license. (Don’t ask) She puts HERSELF (as if evidence proved this to be a good idea) in charge of ensuring she does not lose these 3 VERY important things. Still with me? Was hoping so. After hours of laughter and fun, we get out of the ocean. I still have her phone tucked neatly in between my two lady parts (c’mon, think north people. Up north). JESSICA looks down, and the protector is still around her neck. What’s the problem you ask? What could have possibly went wrong? You may wonder. The case is emptyyyy. Car keys, bank card, and license—gone. Possible future identity theft? Check and Check! We are stranded at the beach. She has no cell service. And you wanna know where my phone was? Bet you can’t tell me. Come, come. Think. Where is Davaaa’s phoooone? 🤔🤔 INSIDE the inaccessible car. Since that’s out of the way, here’s some memorable commentary:

Jess: (5 minutes in) oh GOD! Dava: WHAT? Jess: I forgot the wings for the board! Dava: (having no idea what she’s talking about) the WINGS? You forgot the WINGS, JESS? Jess: I knew I forgot something. Dava: That sounds important. Like I feel like we need wings. How can we fly without wings, Jess? HOW? Jess: (Laughing) No, we will be okay. We might fall though. Dava: FALL?! You mean in the ocean fall? How, howwww do you tell me this once we are already in the OCEAN. It’s like “oh, by the way, we might DIE, but no worries. Just have fun. Don’t think too much." 🤦🏾‍♀️

*** Part 2. Dava: these waves are so...so angry. Dava: are you tired of paddling? Let me try (2 seconds later) Dava: No no no no no no, take it back! Dava: Will we ever get back to shore? Jess: Try to stand up. Dava: What?! Ok, ok. I’ll try. Jess: WHY are you standing up to the side like that? Dava: This is how I see it in movies, trust me. I got this. Jess: Those are SURF boards, loca. Dava: Ooooh... there’s a difference?

***

Jess falls off the board and unsuccessfully attempts to climb back on 9 times. Finally gets on board. I wait a full appropriate pause to say the following:

“Almost lost you there, didn’t I?”

*** Jess: This is why I love hanging out with you. My cheeks always hurt. Dava: 🤔🤔 Jess: From laughing! I mean on my face from laughing! 😩

*** Jess: (after 2 minutes silently walking in defeat) aw nooo, I just changed my card info with all of my companies. Aw man, my house keys were on there! This just keeps getting worse. Dava: 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 crying real tears. *** After harassing strangers for their phones to call Jess’ mom to bring her spare keys (a number she does NOT know by heart by the way, so she just kinda wings it until she happens upon the right number) we are standing on the dock when an ice cream truck drives by:

Dava: Hey, Jess. You want some ice cream? Jess: Yea, sure. Dava: with WHAT MONEY?! ALL of my money is in YOUR LOCKED VEHICLE!

*** Dava: I loved that. Jess: let’s hose off and eat some clams Jess: I’m never going back to that beach again Dava: YEAH, DAMN THAT BEACH .

Dava an hour later: Hey Jess, ‘member that time we went paddling and you lost your keys and ID in the ocean?

....Too soon?

Final Thoughts:

I had a blast. This is something I most certainly will do again. What you probably won’t pick up from the commentary is that we laughed the whole time. That was the best experience of being stranded EVER and the paddling was super fun too. Jess, you truly are one of a kind. Probably the most kind hearted and true friend I have. She’s super smart too. Always a plus. Next up, zip lining! And more adventures before we both do what we do best: go back to school.

Next time, though Jess: EYE will hold the keys. YOU hold your phone.

You never call me anyway.